Beginning a new year is always refreshing. We all take it as an opportunity to start over and do better, to finish things we have never finished and to start things we have never started. To become more efficient, proficient, and achieve a long list of personal goals.
Of course, a new year is just a new year. It holds no magical powers to make us super human...all though some of us try hard to pretend it does. I do. Every year without fail, I set myself up for just that..failure. It may be the hype from those around me that make me jump on the band wagon, but I can't blame others for my failures. So, this year just like every new year, I prepared myself to do something new and improved...to allow my God given talents to take flight and stop making excuses because it's a shame to let them all go to waste...yep, that was a sarcastic sentence. Well, my new found confidence lasted about 2 seconds. I won't go into the ugly details of my lowest moments...my husband can tell you all about it, though... it was pretty pathetic. Not wanting all my pathetic "loser" moments to go totally to waste, I like to share them with you.
Surely, someone out there can relate to my story. Over and over we get to the edge of the mountain and we allow fear to creep in and we just can't soar.
Fact # 1 When you are the most vulnerable is when you are able to hear the best.
That day I realized I wasn't exactly killing it, is the day God sent my son in to reenact my life. It went something like this: He gets home from school. I hear a lot of shouting, followed by a loud bang. I run down to see what was happening and to possibly assert my authority by joining in the chaos with yelling. My three other children are eager to the point of giddiness to retell the whole story..."He was yelling and upset at ____because they were teasing him. He can't take a joke and was so mad he kicked that table and now he is sulking and keeps yelling that, ' he doesn't want to talk about it!' " I used my in charge mom voice and summoned said kid to a private place to interrogate him. It turns out he was upset about the teasing but also about some other things that happened during the day...something that made him doubt himself. I want to stop here and say I never do that..I never get mad and take it out on everyone else because I am upset about something else, I don't know where he gets that from?!Fact #2 I have said it before and I will say it again, God uses my kids to slap me in the face! It's like a live action lesson to "bring home" something He has been trying to tell me.
My son's story was just a reminder of my own that day. He let someone make him doubt himself and although he wanted to blame someone else, all responsibility of his actions and reactions were on him.We never have to question our worth in Jesus Christ. We may slip up, say the wrong thing or maybe we do a tumble down the mountain type fail...it doesn't matter with Jesus we can be restored, we are forgiven. So lesson # 1: God says who you are and that is all that matters.
The real kicker to the whole thing is my son was correct! Here is the scenario...you're surrounded by a group of your peers, 3 or more I would say, and they are all telling you the same thing...just assume that they are not all wise or good counsel, but they are negating what you just said..to be looking at the king walk in naked with no beautiful royal clothes on and say "He is naked!" while the crowd shuns you for thinking such a crazy thing. Guess what?
The king was naked. So lesson #2. When we choose to follow Jesus, not only does He say who we are but with Him we are always the majority. He is the only backing we need, His cheers and His opinion is the one that matters...even when you are faced with opposition from someone you have looked up to for your entire life.
Fact # 3 If God has given you a dream; a job to do; a burden, then you can be assured that it is Him who will give you the ability to achieve it.
I have to give a warning here...God never goes against His word, if it doesn't line up with His word than it is not from Him. God also gives us a guide called the Holy Spirit...learn to discern and listen to what He is saying to you. 
My family and I spent 13 years living in Russia, as you can imagine, life in Russia is very different and it's culture took time to understand. One of my memories of these nuances was seeing a vendor on the street getting someones attention by there product and/or very clever sales pitch. It only took one and soon another would stop and from there it was like a magnetic miracle to watch the crowd grow. Just because it seems to be a good idea to one person and leads others into the same direction doesn't make it a great idea. Make sure you are not being influenced by love of popular views or the need to be recognized...check your motives. Whether it is needing to be a part of the crowd or trying to be the maverick that stands alone, both can be wrong when done in the wrong attitude and wrong motivation. Here is a hint: All glory and all honor belongs to God. If we are looking for an achievement to complete us or for selfish reasons at all, we are sure to come up empty. Even when we try to disguise it as something we are doing as "unto God" we may fool others but God is never fooled, He knows the inner workings of our heart. You cannot hide the truth from Him.
Fact #4 God + us+ trust in God=unstoppable.
Fear of what we could be if we really surrendered ourselves...our sickness, weakness, insecurities, etc.. to God keeps us stuck in the slave land of "what if?" We have been living with our own sicknesses so long we would rather be enslaved to that sickness than be free. The familiar, yet unhealthy, comfort of it keeps us from being who God really made us to be. Example: Those crazy Isrealites whom God delivered out of slavery, who were so fearful they wanted to go back to slavery again! This is what they said to their leader Moses:"Didn’t we tell you this would happen while we were still in Egypt? We said, ‘Leave us alone! Let us be slaves to the Egyptians. It’s better to be a slave in Egypt than a corpse in the wilderness!’”
Exodus 14:12
Moses replies: "Don’t be afraid. Just stand still and watch the Lord rescue you today. The Egyptians you see today will never be seen again. The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.” Exodus 14:13,14
Fact #5 There is growth in the desert.
Being free from our "stuff" doesn't mean that God is going to expect us to do something radical...alone, because He will ask us to do radical things but "He will fight for us." we just need to stay calm.
I don't know about you but I would rather be free and living within "the land of milk and honey" than be enslaved, but to be free we have to trust God through the healing...through the desert. Trusting God through the desert is a game changer, it puts everything in Gods hands because when we can't He has to; fully trusting Him. We lose ourselves in the desert along with all the stuff that hinders us and we start to become more like Him.
So, now we are in March, a perfect time for new beginnings. Don't be afraid to be awesome. Because when we are fully in Jesus He is the awesome we cannot be. Embrace Him and His purpose in you. No regrets. When you let yourself be awesome, you inspire others around you to be awesome too.
