Mending

It's been 3 years today...

I read an article a few months after we buried Mark's dad and my mom. It was an article on how men grieve. One story has stuck with me...
a man went out in the woods and struck a tree, damaging the trunk, and stripping away some of it's bark. Periodically, this man would come back to the tree to see how the tree was mending...reminding him of how he was mending too.
How long does grieving take? This is what we all want answered in those moments when you can't breathe and your heart aches and there is nothing that can stop it or make it go away. Someone told me that how important the person was that you are grieving for, determines the length of your grief. No magical date...no set timeline.
When a tree is wounded, it must grow over and compartmentalize the wound. As a result, the wound is contained within the tree forever.
What I have found out is I will never be the same...the scars are there for good. What we become is up to us...we can allow the creator to mold us and teach us, refining us into something rare, something beautiful, or we can be stifled by fear and anger.
As I see the scars in my life I feel loved by a God who gives me life in death, gifts in emptiness. Wrestling like Jacob to receive the blessing in this lonely place...I choose to walk with a limp, to be with Him in the most intimate way, as a shepherd carries His lame sheep on His shoulders...let Him heal you and teach the beauty that is right in your midst.
In my mind I walk to the tree and see the scar and don't deny the pain, but I know that God is healing me, teaching me, refining me.
This season as we celebrate the gift of Jesus, I pray your thoughts will bring you back.to the the gift that has been given to us,Jesus...everyday since His coming has been reason to celebrate. We have victory over death!